Read Fury: A Memoir by Koren Zailckas Online

fury-a-memoir

Read Koren Zailckas's blogs and other content on the Penguin Community. The author of the iconic New York Times bestseller Smashed undertakes a quest to confront her own anger. In the years following the publication of her landmark memoir, Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood, Koren Zailckas stays sober and relegates binge drinking to her past. But a psychological legacyRead Koren Zailckas's blogs and other content on the Penguin Community. The author of the iconic New York Times bestseller Smashed undertakes a quest to confront her own anger. In the years following the publication of her landmark memoir, Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood, Koren Zailckas stays sober and relegates binge drinking to her past. But a psychological legacy of repression lingers-her sobriety is a loose surface layer atop a hard- packed, unacknowledged rage that wreaks havoc on Koren emotionally and professionally. When a failed relationship leads Koren back to her childhood home, she sinks into emotional crisis-writer's block, depression, anxiety. Only when she begins to apply her research on a book about anger to the turmoil of her own life does she learn what denial has cost her. The result is a blisteringly honest chronicle of the consequences of anger displaced and the balm of anger discovered. Readers who recognized themselves or someone they love in the pages of Smashed will identify with Koren's life-altering exploration and the necessity of exposing anger's origins in order to flourish in love and life as an adult. Combining sophisticated sociological research with a dramatic and deeply personal story that grapples boldly with identity and family, Fury is a dazzling work by a young writer at the height of her powers that is certain to touch a cultural nerve.Watch a Video...

Title : Fury: A Memoir
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 9780670022304
Format Type : Hardcover
Number of Pages : 318 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

Fury: A Memoir Reviews

  • Megankellie
    2019-03-29 03:46

    I wish goodreads had half star options. Only read this book if you are under 27 and never been in therapy. This book makes me feel like a psychopath and like the world doesn't make sense. No one hassled her for talking like a person in a long dress standing in a subtle breeze and responding cordially to servants. There are very few jokes, no "and then we fell over and one guy farted also I think something puked in here" and I know the location of her apartment so I cannot empathize (it's a great location) (1.5 bedrooms and no roommates). There are very good moments where I was like "YES YES! GO FOR IT! GO THERE!" and instead she quoted someone academic that I don't care about. Also this is basically a story of "I met a guy, got married and had a baby." I have absolutely zero empathy about that and she said during her therapy sessions she never really got angry, which she said in a convoluted and overly blah-blah-my-muslin-dress kinda way. Eat, Pray, Love talks about fury so much better than this book.. I'm only upset with her because I had huge, high hopes and really wanted her to go for it, and to take us on the ride of anger. But whatever, I might be naturally angrier than her, but I cannot empathize with a woman finding "the one true miracle of my life" which is a dude and dealing with career frustration after publishing a book at 23. Yeah, yeah, we all have the right to our own feelings zz, but TAKE ME THERE. I'm sure there's room to empathize/understand anger felt by someone in love with a sensitive British songwriter, who blah blah is amazing, but instead it felt like a way to brag. "Sometimes, when I am in my Rolls Royce with my masseuse, children and husband--who all really, really, really love me in a profound and honest way, ps--it's just, what's the word--difficult for several seconds." Which I'm sure it actually is sometimes, but she never describes the actual emotion. NOTHING is raw.I haven't read her first book, I hope it is better. I am shocked that someone with an alcohol problem (I guess?) doesn't feel splitting and insane rages that she could talk about with xxxtreme detail. This book was confusing and disappointing. I had to put it down 80% of the way through because of my fury about hearing how her wedding planning (in Paris) was difficult sometimes. "Withholding and denial got in the way of my relationships" (that is a misquote). Bullshit. Or maybe, but what, you have one therapist and now we're all good? I have extremely strong feelings about this book and would love to hear intimate detail, not some research-quoting. Anyway, I loved the prologue and most of the beginning, but this brand of repression and grief is very foreign to me for the most part. The food she mentions is salmon with a miso glaze. When does she eat a pound of reese's pieces in a parking lot? She is all airy intellect and not one iota shitting meat, which is being a person, I think. The vermin in her world are mice, not hair clogs pulled from a pipe or a dead rat in a gutter. Also, seriously, the very end is her married with a baby. I read the last sentence that was like "I looked at my baby girl and my husband" and I can't read anything else since I took a flame thrower to my bedroom.I do not wish her ill, but if you know from anger that stems from something deep, old and biblicalish, that features like fire and black holes and flaying, this is NOT the book for you. If you have modern-day woman anger that comes from your age or status or money or creative fulfillment or disappointment this is NOT the book for you. You will not commiserate, you will not feel met where you are, you will not see actual empathy, you will not see your own wounds healed. You will hear about tonglen and holistic medicine, which feels like a stand in for something Catholic--like the same formula, only approved by Anthropology, the clothing store, or someone who is snobbish about what will make her feel better. I am just saying, if this book appeals to you--and I read it hoping for the scalp-opening vent in two days--CAVEAT EMPTOR. If you are me, you will feel white hot rage at a book about anger, which I'm sure is a Buddhist kohn or something. I guess just manage your expectations. And look for my new book called "I AM CATHOLIC AND IT IS FUCKING GREAT" (I am not Catholic) or "I AM 55, SINGLE, WITH CAT AND I AM SERIOUSLY VERY HAPPY" or "I DO A LOT OF ANIMAL TYPE SHITTING-AND-FUCKING-ISH-STUFF AND I LOVE DIET COKE BUT I ALSO HAVE A HEART AND I'M NOT ENDLESSLY PISSED ANYMORE." Or maybe just a smiling picture of me with "I'D RATHER NOT BE SO FUCKING ANGRY." I think it will be a best seller.the end.ETA: I had to change the stars to one. I am still obsessively thinking about this book, which maybe means I should change the stars to 5. Maybe once a week I'll sign in and change it from 5 to 1 and then back to 5. Is anger from the gulf between expectation and result? Disappointment? Ugh. I told someone twice within two weeks to never read this book, completely forgetting I'd already sermonized about it. I'm glad she wrote it. Maybe everyone should read it. Maybe we can all take a chain saw to it. Someone call me.ETA in 2013: I am still angry about this book. When people like this review I think about it again and get reangry. Well, I had the unfortunate experience of someone saying the sentence "I'm jealous of her. No I'm envious. Wait--what is the one that is the nice one, jealousy or envy? I can't remember." AND reading a book that tells you how to not be a boring droning fuckface in conversation, which is highlighted by "do not talk about anything you believe in passionately" because an accident will happen in your brain and you will talk and talk and talk until love is a lie and everyone is alienated and it is an accident. OKAY. The point is, while I still hate this book, I hate it because I am deeply envious. Envious is the bad one. I looked it up. I went to a gong bath, which was very transformative, seriously, yes I know how that sounds, and I realized something ABOUT THIS FUCKING BOOK THAT PLAGUES ME, which is that it should be retitled: "Psychic Acupuncture." I envy the ways that she experiences the spectrum of human emotion. ETA in 2015: If I have failed at it, I don't want you to have it. I want it to be objectively impossible. I want it not to be a personal disaster, or indication of a weird weakness, or proof that maybe my body will dictate the stuff I get, or the love I receive, or how happy I will get to be. I mean too bad, I don't get to control that, because I'm not a fascist dictator. I still deeply dislike this book and it makes me angry. I listened to a long back woods sermon on a road trip--it kept going out and cutting in with like pop and Mexican accordions--all about anger. That behind all of it is a fundamental desire for respect, that anger masks deep insecurity. I can get into that.ETA in later 2015: The answer is Claire Messud's "The Woman Upstairs"

  • Kerensa
    2019-04-12 00:03

    Essentially what Zailckas did was get dumped and whine about it. She relied too heavily on the use of academic quotes instead of actually going further with her emotions. I felt like I was reading a first year college Comp. class essay. It's pretty much [Insert feeling] [Insert quote to explain feeling]. I hate the overuse of quotes to explain a topic or feeling and there was at least one on every page. I loved her first book & really wish this one was written like that one.

  • Heather
    2019-04-06 04:47

    Fury is intriguing but not enthralling. Koren had great success with her early 20's memoir Smashed and as a result was under pressure by her publisher to write a follow up book of some sort. She decided to write a book on her deep seeded anger that stems from childhood issues like her narcissistic mother who never took her feelings seriously. If you are looking for a book that explores anger issues this really isn't it. In order to like this book you are going to have to be really interested in Koren's life, to the point where you are going to have to care about reading pages of emails back and forth to her boyfriend who lives in England whom she went through a bad break-up with. Koren isn't the most likeable person on the planet, and without that sympathy or humanistic bond from reader to author the book is only mildly interesting. I feel at the end of the day she was writing it more out of obligation than anything and as a result of such false pressure the topic loses its luster.

  • Kelly Hager
    2019-04-10 01:03

    You might know Koren Zailckas from her earlier memoir, Smashed. I didn't read that, but my best friend Jen did and said it was (a) very good and (b) featured Ocean City, where I have spent many a summer day.But we're not here to talk about Smashed, binge drinking or Ocean City.After Smashed, she wanted to write a book about anger, but it just wasn't working. Then, after a breakup (a really bad breakup) with someone she calls the Lark, she moves back in with her parents (her apartment is being subletted) and seeks therapy. Her family dynamic is one where anger isn't really expressed. Instead, huge things are glossed over and minor irritations (being cut off in traffic; dinner being late) are treated as major infractions.This book is so amazing! I don't normally read non-fiction, but this is exactly the kind I do like: it sort of reads like a novel and the "heroine" is completely relatable. It also reminds me of Odd Girl Out, which I read for my book club. The idea behind that is that teenage girls become bitchy and passive-aggressive because it's the only way we're taught that we can express anger. This book deals with that theme as well (obviously, I guess, in a book called Fury).And also, I want to hire her to ghostwrite all my emails and blog posts from now on.This is part of an email she sent to the Lark: "...as for the question of memories, I can't answer it right now Not the fact that this ended, but the way in which it ended tarnished so many memories I would've liked to keep."Who hasn't felt that way about a relationship? And there's this:"My hunt for a shrink is not what you might call an informed search. I don't seek out recommendations. I don't ask for referrals. I select a woman on the sole basis that her practice is located three blocks from my apartment, which, in the death grip of depression, is the farthest commute I can undertake."So in case you're like me and you tend to avoid nonfiction because it's usually dry and boring, know that this is the exact opposite of that. Koren is the kind of person we all wish we were friends with. :)

  • shannon
    2019-04-18 04:56

    i don't know that i would marry someone who respondes to an accidental broken window by calling me an idiot, and who seems too frequently ask "what the fuck is wrong with you". but then, when i put together my list of acceptable qualities in a mate, it was "decent hygiene, ability to actually be employed as *something*, not horrifically fucking damaged and not an asshole." apparently i like to follow fiction about unpleasant families with memoirs about them. i seem to have this fondness for memoirs in which i find myself thinking "how can a person actually have anything to write about when they appear too intolerable for anyone else to want to even be around? [hey, there, julie powell!]" what horrible people they all are! didn't i say i was going back to classics? WHY AM I SUCH A LITERARY MASOCHIST???? is scott pilgrim going to make me mad? people i respect seem to have enjoyed them.....

  • Mallory
    2019-03-26 01:03

    Is it research, or is it memoir? The problem that Koren Zailckas does by trying to combine the two is that she does neither terribly successfully. The research bits often don't fit in well with the narrative and her narrative feels thin in many places. Overall, it was a good idea that just didn't work very well on the page, which is a shame. Repressed emotions are both an interesting and important topic, and the idea that women repress anger (or pretend it is something else) so frequently in our society is one that needs to be addressed. This work just simply wasn't the correct medium with which to address it.

  • Brian S. Wise
    2019-04-03 05:06

    I don't dislike Zailckas' writing style, and I liked "Smashed", but I disliked this book immensely. A slew of self-diagnosis, quotes from writers that exist only for the purpose of balancing her self-diagnosis, extended conversations with her therapist - these are all writing devices I cannot stand. In other words, "Fury" reads an awful lot like a book constructed for no discernible reason other than it was time to write a book. Like the cover, though.

  • Lori Wilson
    2019-04-20 04:58

    Not sure why I didn't like this book. The author has overcome her alcohol addiction, and now has trouble experiencing all of her normal emotions, especially anger. It didn't pull me into the story and it seemed to me that she was really being whiney and resistant!

  • Annie
    2019-03-22 07:46

    Fury really resonated with me. I want to write Koren a thank you letter for writing this book and helping me further understand myself, my ideals and the concepts that can frame a life. It is a perspective-changer. This memoir is about anger, more specifically, women and anger. Against the arc of Koren’s personal story, other anger theories are included from her extensive research, a format much like her other bestselling book,Smashed . The book begins with Koren racing back to the United States, after a horrible fight with her British boyfriend. As she recovers at her childhood home, Koren finds the book she is writing about anger has stalled and she isn't making any progress. She turns to homeopathy, meditation and psychology for further research and also to see if she can find a cure for her own repressed anger.This is where we are different personalities. In my family, I am known as the “emotional one.” I don’t struggle with repressed anger. I have a temper. Anger is easily accessed for me. In my own furious state, I can be cruel, throwing biting words like arrows at my assailant. Although Koren and I both handle anger in strikingly different ways, I could relate to so many of her findings and insights. The themes behind her repression, feeling unaccepted and unimportant in her family, childhood anger not correctly expressed or handled, a constant urging to suppress her more unpleasant emotions, were very familiar to me. After reading about her journey, I felt an urge to get to the root of what is driving my anger, then find meaningful ways to confront and heal from the past. Zailckas tends to use a lot of profanity in her writing and I was offended by a comment she made-just because of my religious beliefs-hence the reason this didn’t quite make it to five stars. But it’s very close. She is witty, concise and so likable. I really wanted her to get her happy ending. I was shocked by her family’s reaction at one portion of the book. I am really glad she would share such personal parts of her life (her own therapy sessions!) and illustrate that with hard work and personal determination, you can come to terms with whatever pain you have in your past. She demonstrates how the rewards of changing and understanding and accepting your history allow you to be more present in your current life and live better and more wholly in the present. While this might sound cheesy and cliché, Zailckas is such a fresh writer with a decidedly original perspective and persona, it is entertaining and inspiring. When an author combines real research against a deeply personal, yet relatable story, it’s a very powerful book. Can I give her all social issues to write about, please? I am very happy she wrote this, I liked it A LOT.Favorite Quotes:Anger seems to listen to argument to some extent, but to mishear it, as do hasty servants who run out before they have heard the whole of what one says, and then muddle the order.-AristotleI’m not envious that she’s having a baby, but rather that she feels equipped to do it. How does she feel secure enough? How does she know she won’t delegate her suffering to her children? How can she be sure that she won’t revenge herself on what her latest ultrasound showed was her baby girl? Or make her daughter feel as though it is her sole responsibility to make my sister feel validated? I am fully aware that I’m already controlling and overly critical of my sister, adverse to the helpless devotion of pets, and indignant to the neediness of my dates, and frankly I doubt my potential as a mother.Yes, this is my family. Yes, we are bad at special occasions. Sure, we have our blemishes: Within the confines of our family, we’re crude communicators; we don’t always trust one another; we don’t always trust ourselves. But every now and again there is comedy in our shortcomings. Our flaws make us human; our humanity means our days together are numbered and the brevity of our time together is what makes it so very special.Years earlier, back when I first began thinking I might like to write a book about anger, my friend and yoga teacher Rolf shared his philosophy on the subject. Whenever we spoke about what I was writing, he liked to say, “Koren, just remember, you can’t blame the bear.” This was shorthand for a longer conversation in which he’d asked me the rather disturbing question: “Would you be angry at a bear if it mauled you?”….Rolf had gone on to ask: “You wouldn’t blame the bear because it’s a wild animal, right? And that’s what wild animals do. So why, for instance, would you blame your parents for failing you when you know all human beings are flawed?’ Try as I did, I’ve never really found a decent retort. I know it’s like expecting a grizzly to sit down over espresso and do my taxes, but I want my family to be a place of nourishment and support, unfailingly and always.

  • Cj
    2019-04-07 07:02

    Not a memoir but more a research book into anger theories. Yes, the author uses her life as an example, but as with her first book too much psychobabble and research notes to really make it a memoir (and it's not in the biography section of my library). The author psychologically analyzes her anger, her distance from people and the book reads that way--like she's talking about a distant character.

  • Katherine
    2019-04-16 04:07

    The author explores her repressed self in this book and the outcome via therapy and a lot of self-reflection is getting in touch with her anger and using anger to facilitate a healing process that allows for more love, love, love. Too happy ending-ish. This book pissed me off. I slam threw it down when finished.

  • Jason
    2019-04-14 04:06

    "Your anger is a gift." -Rage Against the Machine (1992)Really, Zack? Is it always? I think Koren, and I for that matter, may have to disagree with you.This is an incredible book. What seems to start out as a "Bridget Jones' Diary" retread (which I can only imagine, as I have not actually seen the entire movie; only short clips from its numerous runs on basic cable), quickly evolves into one of the most honest memoirs I have read in quite some time. One that manages to take on a very serious topic, anger, without insulting the reader by dumbing-it-down to proselytizing or "how-to" bullet points to solve your own problems via the trials and tribulations of the author's own life. It was quite refreshing to see the evolution from Koren's attempt to write an expository effort regarding the topic, to one of personal examination and reflection. And I cannot state this enough, it was fantastic NOT to have to read chapter headings of the "It's OK to not be OK" ilk.What also makes this work so satisfying in the end, is the lack of resolution. The author's story is continuing, as should yours.Well done, Koren, well done.

  • Andrea DeAngelis
    2019-04-11 05:47

    I read this book in a flash because I think the subject matter - repressed anger - is not commonly addressed or maybe I'm mistaken. Memoir is not really the right genre for this because it's more than that, Zailckas was trying to write a book on anger but suffered from a major creative impass. It was only until she realize she was repressing her own anger that she was able to retool her book into this strange concoction. She didn't even realize that she had severe problems with processing and expressing her own anger. Zailckas includes a great deal of her original book's anger research along with her personal experiences, creating a fascinating, emotionally compelling, deftly sociological book that was difficult to put down. I will most likely draw upon her observations and experiences for years to come.

  • Camyla H.
    2019-04-08 02:06

    I suppose you could say I expected much more out of this book considering I'd just read "Smashed" merely a month before. The more I get to know this author through her memoir, the more I realize she's a complainer who has been handed a lot of things on a silver spoon and she should have just "sucked it up" and realized how easy she had it compared to most of the rest of the world. It was also quite annoying to read constantly about the history behind anger. Had I wanted to learn about the history of anger, I would have read another book. Honestly, I believe she was using this history lesson as filler to fluff her memoir.

  • Roanne
    2019-03-30 07:09

    I wanted to like this more than I did, and am not really sure why I didn't, actually. Her relationship with her mother is strikingly like mine, and her mother's poverty-laced childhood is markedly like my mother's. Our reaction to this relationship is quite different, though, and as I read further along Koren's journey, the less empathy I felt. She frustrated me because in the end I found her to be just as much of a bully as her mother.Kudos for the prose itself; this is well and thoughtfully written.

  • Melissa
    2019-03-21 06:13

    I really enjoyed the author's first book. I was relatable and entertaining. This was neither. The writing was pretentious, the random researchy bits about anger were oddly placed. I skimmed the last 3rd looking for something interesting. There wasn't anything.

  • Kim
    2019-04-16 04:08

    I felt like the author relied too heavily on other sources. I understand that she did a lot of esearch on anger and wanted to use it, but there were too many direct quotes and paraphrases of other people's thoughts. The really interesting parts were her own thoughts.

  • Theanne
    2019-04-04 07:47

    This book was disappointing. At the beginning I really enjoyed reading it, but soon I got bored due to its repetitiveness and I got turned off by the whiny tone the novel took on. I just wanted to yell at her, "get over yourself and get your stuff together!" Wasn't for me..

  • Jessica
    2019-04-09 00:04

    I really wanted to like this book but I had a lot of trouble getting through it. The author had some interesting insights but just when I’d be intrigued, she’d fall off and go another direction. She mentioned many times feeling rushed to write this book and I think it’s very obvious. The “idea” of this book was interesting but I felt like I was reading a collection of blurbs from other research studies but they weren’t really matching with her own personal stories. Koren is an excellent writer no doubt but the pressure to finish this book really interfered with its overall quality.

  • Kathryn
    2019-03-24 00:44

    I really loved Zailckas's earlier memoir Smashed, when I read it earlier this year. So much so that I went and put her other books on reserve at the library right when I finished. She has a wonderful talent for mixing personal experience with research without it feeling forced. This book had me thinking a lot about my own experiences with anger and our cultural attitude toward female anger in particular. It's also a real life love story that I wasn't completely expecting. It's pretty great.

  • Joy
    2019-03-26 04:06

    "I'm not envious that she's having a baby, but rather that she feels equipped to do it. How does she feel secure enough? How does she know she won't delegate her suffering to her children? How can she be sure that she won't revenge herself on what her latest ultrasound showed was her baby girl? Or make her daughter feel as though it is her sole responsibility to make my sister feel validated? I am fully aware that I'm already controlling and overly critical of my sister, averse to the helpless devotion of pets, and indignant to the neediness of my dates, and frankly I doubt my potential as a mother.""In the absence of information the mind concocts its own stories. Once the idea is formed I feel rage open in the pit of my stomach and roar through me like a howl."Martha Stout, "The Sociopath Next Door""Wasn't I allowed a few emotions of my own? Was it too much to own my experience without her trumping them with stories from her past? I'm entitled to be as mad as a meat ax. Virginia Satir said, "Anger is not a vice; it is a respectable human emotion that can be used in an emergency." As far as I'm concerned, this is an emergency. I'm in pain. I'm sad. Given the situation, this seems acceptable. I'm allowed to worry a little about how the stress of it all will impact Eamon and me. The logical part of me knows we can handle it. But the scared kid in me still expects rejection to follow any change." "No matter how stoic I feel, no one in my family sees me that way. They have no insight into how many emotions I actually hold back. They only see the Spike 3 - variety anger, the "impulsive" and "inappropriate" fury that comes hurling out of me when I can't stand to bite my tongue a single second more. This is our impasse. On one hand, I tend to freak out in some situations, bringing a depth of emotion to them that my family is at a loss to understand. On the other, they see any reaction as an overreaction. They would much rather I put on a resigned expression.""You wouldn't be human if you weren't feeling all these things right now. They're too lost in their own problems to be there with you, in the present. That's the devastating part - feelings like nobody sees you. But you're normal. And your anger is too.""I feel free to experience things with an open heart. I remember an interview I'd once read with Virginia Satir in which she said: "Do you know what makes it possible for me to trust the unknown? Because I've got eyes, ears, skin. I can talk, I can move, I can feel, and I can think. And that's not going to change when I go into a new context...I can move anywhere. Why not?..I have never have to say yes when I feel no. I never have to say no when I feel yes." I feel confident that I'll be okay just as long as I remain firmly rooted in the present, in touch with my surroundings and aware of my emotions.""Quarrels in France strengthen a love affair, in America they end it." Ned Rorem"Yes, this is my family. Yes, we are bad at special occasions. Sure, we have our blemishes: Within the confines of our family, we're crude communicators; we don't always trust one another; we don't always trust ourselves. But every now and again there is comedy in our shortcomings. Our flaws make us human; our humanity means our days together are numbered; and the brevity of our time together is what makes it so very special.""The only control a person has is over herself, her anger, her emotions, her love. I can't decide how my family relates to me, I can only control when and how I react.""Satir wrote, "I own what comes out of me- my words, thoughts, body movement, my deeds. I might have been influenced by you, but I made the decision to act on that influence, so that part is my show completely."

  • Trixie Mcbimbo
    2019-04-18 23:44

    So....Koren tells her family that her therapist says her family is pretty dysfunctional, and her sister nearly punches her in the face for it, her mother flies off the handle at Koren and sides with Koren sister because no matter what, that is what they do, and her father just seems to have the ability to shut down when the shit hits the fan, and all that happened the night she just had a miscarriage? Koren had NO ALLIES in her immediate family. She had to bury her anger so deep as to not "rock the boat" and was lonely. She had no one while growing up in that home to turn to who loved her unconditionally, who would listen to her, acknowledge her pain and loneliness, and no one who would stick up for her. It was good to see her mother tell Koren that if she's upset or angry with her then Koren needs to talk to her about it ASAP instead of shoving it down shoving it down shoving it down. That's a big step in the right direction.As for her sister: she needs to get the eff over herself and stop acting like family life is a damn Jerry Springer episode. As the baby of my own family, of course I'm a brat, but Koren's sister is just despicable and self-centered. Maybe having a kid and a husband and niece will help ground her, but she owes it to Koren to talk about the night she almost clocked Koren in the face RIGHT AFTER she had a miscarriage. Speaking as someone who only has an older sister who's also been my 2nd mom, there will never be enough *facepalms* on Earth that will ever cause me to justify Koren's sister's behavior.Moving on to the subject of "fury":I think we all need to put into perspective that it's only been over 100 years ago that women won the chance to vote, and it took give or take 100 years for a woman to run for president.Men, put yourself in our shoes: wouldn't you be pissed off to know that the fact that you don't have a penis is the reason you don't get paid as much as a man? Wouldn't you be pissed off not to be able to vote, go to college, or that you've been betrothed and have no choice but to marry a complete stranger because your parents auctioned you off, that you are not allowed to be a human being with her own intelligence, passions, convictions and opinions, and every time you try to vent your frustrations you're met with "Oh, you'll be fine, you're just having your period right now". I'm sure the asshat who clocked Snooki in the face was just on the rag too, right? Wouldn't you be furious if you were a woman forced to watch her sister be burned alive at the stake because it was determined that she is a witch? What about being a 10 year old girl who is kidnapped and forced into sexual trafficking: wouldn't that make you more than a bit miffed?Women have been brainwashed into believing that they are property and completely inferior. The same way men have been brainwashed into believing that FURY is the only acceptable emotion they can express. "Fight Club" is a book, not a movie. Us chicks all know guys want to be as badass as Tyler Durden, ok guys? Fine, Pacino was amazing in "Scarface". WE GET IT. But nobody wants to settle down and have kids with either one of those guys if they were the last men on Earth.

  • Thomas Holbrook
    2019-04-21 03:44

    Fury is not intended to be a book on addiction recovery but I have read few books that offer a more vivid picture of the recovery process. Those who are learning to live without addiction speak of being “clean and sober.” For those who do not have to work daily to keep from returning to an active addiction, such language is foreign, if one is “clean” one is also “sober.” The reality is one is “clean” when they are not using the substance to which they are addicted, one is “sober” when they are doing “what it takes” to stay clean. In Ms. Zailckas’ first memoir, she recounts her life of binge drinking and “getting clean,” in this continuation (but one need not read the first to appreciate the second) of that account the author gives a glimpse into what it takes to be “sober.” Koren Zailckas meets a man through friends and began a relationship online, not meeting in person for months. Within a year of that meeting she had relocated to Brighton, UK, to live with this person. By the end of the first month there, after a heated argument, she was back to the U.S., living with her parents, irate at the young man, whom she nick named “The Lark.” Because of her anger, she decided to write her next book about anger; she had no idea that research would turn into a memoir. The early part of the book is a bit tedious – the pace is slow and the writing sterile. It is not until she begins the process of looking at how she “played into” the events that lead to such a devastating fight that the writing begins to live, much like the author begins to “live.” She decides to enter psychotherapy and find out, first hand, about anger. Initially, she approaches therapy “as if it were a night class,” reading about anger, theories of approaches to resolving anger, family therapists who help people deal with anger and its consequences. As Alice, her very talented therapist, pushes her to look beyond the surface, the author begins to “recover” in ways that are, by turns (and all at once), amazing, painful, redeeming, shattering and clarifying. The year she spends in this process is an example of what can happen when an individual chooses to do the difficult work of making the needed changes when they realize their lives are “dysfunctional.” The moment she “gives” The Lark is name back is a powerful revelation of a person “getting it” and is a significant turning point in the author’s life. In a book with the title “Fury,” one can expect harsh language and violence. The former is present, but not to the extent one could expect and the latter is present only in the form of emotional violence, of which there is plenty. Ms. Zailckas reports to be a Buddhist but there is a point in the story where she allows herself to believe there is a personal God, that turns out to be a painful moment. At the end of the book, the author is still furious, but that anger is no longer seen as an intruder, it has become a sometime guest who must be acknowledged. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who is: learning to deal with intense emotion(s), addressing how they were parented, early in addiction recovery and/or interested to see how self-examination can lead to meaningful, healthy change.

  • Britney Bulah
    2019-03-30 05:50

    I enjoy reading memoirs because I love personal experiences, the feeling that this has happened to someone and affected their lives greatly enough to write about it. Fury is the story of a girl who has just moved to America from England to escape the heartache of the love of her life eventually finding a new one. She is coping with her alcohol addiction and attempting to find herself in her problems. Fury follows Koren through the process of encountering her problems, and slowly letting out all the anger she has inside of her. I think Zailckas does a great job at connecting with the reader with the description of her family problems and great ability to tell a story, even I a young women felt connected to her throughout this novel. The author's style I found very interesting because often I found her going on rants about certain things such as medications and remedies for her anger. I enjoyed her use of names for different people such as her sweetheart known as the Lark. I love how at times the book can seem so dark especially with the quotes in between chapters. The use of vocabulary and her ability to describe herself, and her anger in so many ways making her seem lost. My favorite quote is, "depression is anger without enthusiasm" because it highlights how almost alone she is feeling. It amazes me how Zailckas reaches all of her audience from the partiers, to the just-got-dumped, the helplessly in love, the mad-at-everythings, and finally to the stressed out mothers.Another thing that stuck out at me in the novel was the plot. For me it was almost hard to catch onto at first moving from England then back to England then Paris all while dealing with finding herself. The way she connects her feelings to citing great philosophers of our past shows us her sophistication and helps us to better understand her spoken words. She does a good job at explaining why although sometimes I found that I did not actually see what was so wrong it her life.Overall I give this book a three out of five because at times I thought it could be a little bit dry. Some of the references she made, although I tried, I could not easily understand. I enjoyed her story though and realized that it did infact turn into a happy ending which surprised me. Although I read the second one in her series I was able to see where she was coming from. I would like to read her first novel Smashed and I think that it could uncover some of the questions I still have.

  • Michelle Hoogterp
    2019-04-09 02:49

    Phenomenal! This really spoke to me. Koren's experiences really set of a personal resonance. I found myself growing angry along with her and noticing some of my own habits and fears in her and her family. This was an eye-opening book and I highly recommend it to people who are "nice girls" or who have trouble showing any sort of anger for whatever reason. Any therapist who suggests books to patients who are dealing with emotional struggles would do well to have this in their arsenal.There are some who will read this memoir and think she's way too angry in the end or puts up with an angry husband, but anger is a natural emotion that lots of people try to repress only to have it spill out some other way. We have the right to be angry over a window that gets broken while we're sitting on the john and sharp slivers to flying everywhere just as much as we have the right to be angry when we're not listened to, but it's a matter of acknowleding that right within us.I deal with not being angry and trying to find my voice again. I don't know that I like the idea of a husband who would yell at me over the window, but when I read the book I can't blame his anger because he could've been really hurt. However, I don't like the idea of being called stupid or being cursed at. I would prefer someone who vocalized their anger differently.

  • JC
    2019-04-01 06:49

    Was very much intrigued to read a book about anger from the author of the well-regarded Smashed (which I am about to read). Being an alcoholic myself with anger issues I wanted to see what she had to say. Unfortunately it felt more like a diary where she complained endlessly about a break-up and not being able to write this book. She came off as whiny and impetuous and kept reminding us she never wanted to resort to violence. As if that were something she should be commended for. There were never any moments where she acknowledged her own wrong doing, or really great insight. Yes, her mother does sound pretty narcissistic, but she brings that up way too late in the book for any real examination of what that means. The book felt like one long research paper with herself as the subject, with zero self-awareness other than the "I don't want to be like her". I hope Smashed is better, and will give me more insight into her life. I held off reading Smashed because I didn't put much stock into a 23 year old writing a memoir, but a book about anger compelled me to pick it up. I don't think Zailckas had the maturity or self-awareness to write yet another memoir.

  • Allison
    2019-04-08 05:50

    Just finished this and really enjoyed it. I read Zailckas' first memoir, Smashed in college and loved it. She is an excellent writer, and a vivid storyteller. When I saw that she had another memoir out (with a really spectacular cover), I couldn't wait to read it.Smashed was her account of binge drinking through her teen and college years, and Fury catches up with her after the publication of her first book. In the process of writing a non-memoir about anger, she discovers that she hasn't dealt with her own emotions, and slowly begins the process of letting them out. I can totally relate to Zailckas' struggle. Emotions are scary, especially negative ones. But they spring up to help us deal with what is not working in our lives. By the end of the book, she lets go, and is much happier. This book is a very timely one for me, and it came to me just when I needed its message most. Highly recommended.

  • Meagan
    2019-03-24 07:06

    I listened to this on audiobook mostly because once I discovered Koren Zailckas had published a new memoir I couldn't wait to read it and audiobooks are easier to fit into my life right now than real reading due to the amount of required reading I have at the moment.Liking her first memoir, Smashed, as much as I did, it seemed possible this would be a let down, but Fury did not disappoint. Once again I found her writing to be like slipping beneath the surface of very warm water, completely surrounded by the details of her world, her emotions and way of thinking. Doesn't feel so much like reading as it feels like being in her head, living her life. In this book, now sober, she digs up the emotional roots of her troubles. It is an exploration and study of anger, depression, as well as romantic relationships, and family.

  • Kara
    2019-04-03 02:46

    Smashed is one of my favorite books so I went into Fury hoping that it would be just as brilliant but fearing that it might fall short of the pedestal I hold Smashed on! I found the beginning a bit slow-going and reluctant to move away from talk of therapies and remedies that made the writing seem almost clinical. But I had faith and stuck it out and, sure enough, about halfway through Fury, more emotion began to work its way in and soon the familiar writing style with the unabashed personal story-telling was out in full-force! It ended with simple honesty and that's part of what makes her stories so appealing. The experiences aren't necessarily unique but they are hers and she opens them up for us to relate and learn.

  • Elizabeth
    2019-04-06 07:47

    I feel odd commenting extensively on the subject matter of this memoir, though if the author went ahead and published it, I suppose I shouldn't be worried. Anyway, I'll say this. This book, before turning into a memoir, was supposed to be a much more impersonal look at women and anger in America, and this really shows. Research material was shoehorned in at the strangest times. For example, the author was recounting an argument with her family, where her sister went in to take a swing at her, and had to be physically restrained and dragged out of the room by her father. Smack dab in the middle of this shocking scene, there are two paragraphs quoting psychotherapist Virginia Satir. Choices like this really disturbed the narrative flow, to say the least.